Answer 13 questions to map your relationship patterns across three dimensions — codependency, counter-dependency, and secure attachment — and receive a personalized relationship map with pattern-specific guidance.
This quiz maps how you connect with others across three dimensions: codependency, counter-dependency (avoidance), and secure attachment.
Relationship patterns are often learned survival mechanisms, not character flaws. Understanding yours is the first step toward building healthier connections.
Answer Scale (Phase 1)
Not a substitute for professional medical advice,
diagnosis, or treatment.
The way we connect with others — how we seek closeness, handle conflict, and navigate vulnerability — is shaped by our earliest experiences with caregivers. These attachment patterns form in childhood and, without conscious intervention, continue to drive our relationship behaviors throughout adulthood.
In a clinical setting — particularly in Intensive Outpatient Programs — understanding relationship dynamics is often the "missing piece" for patients struggling with addiction, BPD, anxiety, or depression. Interpersonal issues are the #1 predictor of relapse in both addiction and mental health recovery, which is why addressing them directly is essential to lasting progress.
The good news: attachment patterns are learned survival mechanisms, not permanent traits. What was learned in one relational environment can be unlearned — and replaced with healthier patterns — in another. This is exactly what structured group therapy, family therapy, and DBT-based IOP programs are designed to do.
These patterns are not rare or unusual — they affect a significant portion of the adult population, and they are especially prevalent in clinical populations seeking treatment for addiction and mental health conditions.
| Relationship Pattern | Prevalence | Key Characteristic |
|---|---|---|
| Secure Attachment | ~50–55% of Population | The baseline for healthy functioning; comfortable with closeness and independence. The target of therapy. |
| Anxious-Preoccupied | ~20% of Adults | High need for closeness and reassurance; "clinging" to relationships to prevent abandonment. |
| Dismissive-Avoidant | ~25% of Adults | Devalues the importance of emotional closeness to avoid the pain of vulnerability. |
| Codependency | High in IOP Populations | Often found in partners and family members of people with addiction or untreated mental illness. |
| Disorganized | ~5–10% of Adults | Oscillates between seeking closeness and pushing away; strongly associated with childhood trauma. |
Sources: Hazan & Shaver (1987), Bartholomew & Horowitz (1991), Levine & Heller (2010). Clinical codependency prevalence based on SAMHSA and IOP population data.
This relationship dynamics quiz screens for the three most common maladaptive relationship patterns seen in intensive treatment settings:
Phase 2 gathers contextual information — your relationship status, family history, and current relational environment — to help you and your provider understand the context behind your patterns.
Medical Disclaimer: This quiz is a screening tool only and is not a clinical diagnosis. Attachment patterns and relationship dynamics are complex and best evaluated by a licensed mental health professional. If you are in crisis, call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline) or call 911.
Treatment Available in Port Charlotte & Arcadia, FL
Interpersonal issues are the #1 predictor of relapse. Our behavioral health specialists can help you understand your patterns and build the communication, boundary, and emotional regulation skills that healthier relationships require.
If you are in crisis, call or text 988 immediately.